Harsh hangovers

By: Evan Finch

Posted: 11/19/08

Ethanol, the primary constituent responsible for all last night's fun, has a host of effects that leave you in the morning feeling, well, basically as if someone simultaneously gave you the flu and beat you over the head with a wooden board.

A chemical explanation made available by Elmherst College attributes the symptoms of a hangover to dehydration, internal organ inflammation and production of relatively toxic chemical byproducts, principally acetaldehyde, produced during the liver's removal of alcohol from the blood.

There are some traditional home remedies that help alleviate the discomfort.

"Eat greasy food," sophomore Keshia Reissman said. "My favorite is onion rings and cheese sauce."

Freshman J.D. Lucas had similar suggestions.

"Saltine crackers and tons of water," she said. "Or just a big, fat, greasy pepperoni pizza."

Various products, including RU-21, Alcohol-X and Chaser, available for order or sold over the counter, claim they can cure a hangover.

In truth, these bottles of pills do little more than prey on one's desire to feel better, faster. Chaser, for example, lists "activated vegetable starch" and calcium carbonate (a basic, or above neutral pH, chemical popularly used in Tums and other antacids) as principal ingredients.

The first "ingredient" is so ambiguous it could describe hundreds of different agents or combinations thereof, much like "natural flavors" on the side of processed food boxes. More than likely, unspecific names spell ineffective products.

According to an article in Ireland's "Independent," certain drugs containing opiates like codeine are shown to be effective, though at a high cost. These drugs simply mask the signals your body sends alerting you it is hurt and trying to heal -perhaps promoting overexertion and creating the potential for severe long-term consequences such as addiction and cluster headaches.

Additionally, over-the-counter painkillers, particularly Tylenol (acetaminophen), pose their own health risks. Also metabolized by the liver, these drugs place additional stress on the organ, potentially leading to acute, short-term failure and an exacerbated risk of long-term cirrhosis.

Patience, coupled with minimalistic, natural methods, usually prove the safest tips for a swift, smooth recovery.

Even better, the best cure for a hangover is prevention and self awareness. Monitor your consumption and space out drinks, so you can gauge how much you're being affected before ordering the next round.