Daly

Manly observations you don't want to miss

By: Michael Daly

Posted: 5/13/09

I'll never top the last column I wrote, so I'm just going to fill this with random observations.

-UW-Whitewater has to cut $7.5 million from its budget in the next two years, according to a letter from Chancellor Richard Telfer. I met Telfer, and he was a pleasant guy. But I've been wondering if his $199,500 salary will be cut. He also has retirement benefits, a car allowance and a $1,700 monthly housing allowance. To be fair, Telfer makes less than the median salary for chancellors at peer universities.

Cutting his salary does little to fix a $7.5 million deficit, but Intercollegiate Athletics has to cut its budget by $30,296. It just seems funny to take money away from a department that affects a lot of people on campus, when you could make the same difference by cutting one guy's fairly sizeable salary.

-If you fart into an empty Pringles can and shut the lid, you can capture the smell for a long time.

-Why did the University Police buy a $13,000 rugged terrain vehicle last year? I know it was to navigate the sidewalks, I just never felt like the sidewalks were that dangerous.

Maybe they've gotten good use out of it, but I know at least one thing they could've taken care of first. How about fixing the lights on campus? The ones that turn off only when you walk under them.

-I think it's ridiculous you have to pay the university for three credits worth of tuition if you get a for-credit internship over the summer. It doesn't cost the school a penny.

-I can't stand when people say the news is "too negative." Negative things are usually more newsworthy; deal with it. The day someone fires a gun and puppies come out of the barrel instead of bullets, it will be on the front page of every paper, trust me.

-One time I got back to my apartment late at night, and I tried putting my ear up against my neighbor's door because I thought I heard people having sex. My neighbor just had the volume on his porn set way too high though.